ELLEVEST INSIGHTS

Caring for an aging parent is something that most of us will face in some capacity at some point in our life, and most of us are underprepared. While supporting our parents through the aging process and end of life care can be deeply loving and meaningful, the harsh reality is that it is logistically challenging, emotionally complicated, and extremely expensive. 

A 2026 report released by A Place For Mom lists the national median costs for senior care/living at $5,419 per month for assisted living, $6,690 per month for memory care, $3,200 per month for independent living and $34 an hour for home care. And according to the US Department of Labor, almost 25% of women over the age of 55 provide unpaid care daily. Among family caregivers, about 60% are female, dedicating an average of 25 hours per week. It has been estimated that women caregivers surrender up to $350,000 or more in wages over their lifetime. 

Needless to say, this is a frequent topic of conversation between Ellevest wealth management clients and their advisors. It highlights one of many reasons Ellevest has developed its wealthcare framework to support women along their financial journeys. While the wealth management industry has historically focused squarely on portfolio construction and maximizing financial returns, Ellevest stretches beyond that traditional service model to help women build wealth in a way that supports overall wellness. 

The wealthcare approach “is the next era of wealth management. It’s financial advice designed to grow and protect your wealth, while also helping you use your wealth in ways that support your values, your well-being, your purpose, and your future.” And when it comes to caring for an aging parent, having a clear sense of your personal values, financial boundaries, and time limits can protect you from unforeseen hardships while delivering meaningful care to those you love the most. 

Because caregiving is so personal, many families avoid talking about it until they have to, and the adult child has to step in suddenly, significantly disrupting their life. The best way to avoid an emergency is to start talking to your parents before an event happens. “Ice-breaking” scripts can be extremely helpful for guiding those initial conversations with your parents. The important thing here is trying not to pressure yourself to tackle everything at once; start with one action step at a time. The main goal is to reassure your parents that you want to be prepared for any future emergencies and that preparation is key to them maintaining their autonomy and control for as long as possible. If your parents have a well documented and well communicated plan in place, the family can step in and honor their parents’ exact wishes! 

So what can you start doing today?

Work with a financial advisor

Speak with your advisor to map out your balance sheet, financial goals, and possible scenarios. The models you build together will show you how financial support, modifying a home, and/or career breaks to support an aging parent will impact your personal retirement goals.

Make sure your parents’ (and your own!) estate planning docs are in place‍

This includes a will, power of attorney, and advanced medical directives. Without these, your parents may lose the ability to decide what happens to their assets. Ask your parents where they keep these documents and create a secure “cheat sheet” of their accounts and passwords. Use this checklist to get started.

Start the conversation

Don’t wait, start today using the ice breakers. Try to establish one action item from your conversation to move the ball forward. 

‍

Caregiving is unpredictable and always changing. A financial plan with well established boundaries can support an optimal caregiving environment that supports your aging parents while respecting your limits and peace of mind.