ELLEVEST INSIGHTS

My maternal grandfather was the medical director of a large hospital in the Chicago area and certainly had the means to live a good life. Not tech-company founder money, but enough. And what I remember about him is how much he enjoyed his life.

When he retired, he spent most of his time traveling. Instead of being concerned with his financial legacy, he focused on how he spent his days with his friends, family, and the hobbies he loved most. When we went to Disney World, he came along. When we would go to Mackinac Island to meet my dad after the 333-mile Chicago-to-Mackinac sailing race, he joined us for a week. When my uncle made it on Broadway, he traveled across the country to see every show he could.

He lived fully. He spent his money. That was his legacy.

When he passed, my mom and her siblings didn’t inherit any money — and they didn't care to. What they did inherit were the stories, the laughter, the adventures, the memories. And that was enough.

Former US Surgeon General C. Everett Koop once said, “Life affords no greater responsibility, no greater privilege, than the raising of the next generation.” And I think that’s exactly right. But somewhere along the way, the wealth management industry lost the plot. We’ve turned legacy into something transactional — an estate plan, a tax strategy, a set of documents in a lawyer’s office.

Over my years in wealth management — both before and during my time at Ellevest — I’ve had countless conversations about “legacy planning.” The industry tends to define it as organizing your assets so your wishes are honored after your death. Which… yes, is important. Estate planning matters. After all, you can not only cost your family a lot of angst going through probate, but you can lose money in taxes by not properly planning. 

But here’s the thing, our legacy should not mean only what happens when we die. At Ellevest, we think it’s time to reclaim legacy planning.

If you could go back and ask your younger self what you wanted out of adulthood, would “die with the most money possible” make the list? Probably not. More likely, you imagined travel, family, friends, purpose, joy — living richly, not just being rich.

Our legacy is the lasting impact, memories, and possessions we leave behind after death. It encompasses tangible assets like money and property, but also the intangible elements such as the stories people tell about us, the traditions we establish, the lessons we teach others, and the love we share.

So ask yourself: Would you rather gift your loved ones an extra lump sum at the end of your life, or spend the money while you can to take your children and grandchildren or lifelong friends on a fabulous vacation that you will all remember forever? 

If you have plenty of money saved, is it worth it to continue to work an extra five years just for the purpose of accumulating more money that you really don’t need or should you use that time to pursue your passions, spend time with your partner or family, or simply enjoy life? 

Financial planning in wealth management tends to focus on how much you spend, how much you have to make, how long you have to work, and then how much you’ll have when you die. But here’s the truth: money is only a tool. It’s not the goal.

I once had a very prominent woman, with access to the top advisors in the world, tell me that they all gave her the same advice: spend less, work longer. When I asked her what really mattered to her — she’s divorced with two young children — she told me she wants to have a thriving career and to maintain the lifestyle she built for her children. So we flipped the script. 

We looked at how long she had to work and calculated how much she would have to make each year to continue to enjoy life in her definition —  trips, private school, dinners with friends —  and she was amazed that this was even an option in financial planning.

I always tell our clients, it is not my job to tell you what to do. It’s my job to give you the tools to make the decision as to what makes you most happy. After all, every person is different. 

So here’s my challenge to the industry: If we’re only focused on our clients’ happiness after they’re gone… are we really serving them?

It’s time to stop treating “legacy” like it’s only about the end of the story. Because the truth is — your legacy is what you’re writing every single day you live it.